You are not your mind.

So i am sitting at my computer... or rather, my laptop is sitting on me... and i am waiting for michael to return from work. we are heading to rob and van's house for a christmas-eve-eve dinner at their brand new house. I am bored, and usually when that happens, i "stumble". not literally, of course, but i "stumble". so, off i go stumbling...

rhyming dictionary; words that rhyme with 'bowl' 
toll.... grassy knoll.... unfold.... ? NEXT.

a random fact about harrison ford
huh... i wonder if that's true...... NEXT.

Acupressure points for emotional well-being
Hmm... this could be interesting... EW, OTHER PEOPLE'S FEETS!! NEXT!!!


FunSwitcher
*Spend about 8 minutes singing along the to community theme song* NEXT....

 and then i saw it... a seemingly dull website of text which ordinarily i would 'next' without consideration... but i stopped and had a little read...

9 mind-bending eipiphanies that turned my world upside-down

(and just as a side note, i haven't even read the entire list yet) well, it had 5152 likes on facebook, so i figured there must be something alright about it. i start the list in the obvious place, number 1, and BAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1. You are not your mind.

 Just... do me a favour and go to the link? I'm not going to copy and paste exactly what it says. That would be completely pointless. It's only one paragraph so just DO it already. So anyway. where was i....? Oh yes. So... you are not your mind. I read this and i'm like "ohh yeah. ok, i'm not my mind. well what the prat am i then, genius? a marble? *instant thoughts of jenna marbles on youtube*

NO! FOCUS! So i read on... and i think hm... this is kind of interesting. but i don't really get it.... so, i google 'you are not your mind'. WHAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THIS ARTICLE is... well... the phrase 'blowing my mind' comes to 'mind' but now the word 'mind' has taken on an entirely different meaning to me, so... i don't really know what to say. so... just read it. OK GREAT!!! (it's christmas, you have all the time in the world right now...unless of course you're copying jenna marbles and getting drunk to decorate your christmas tree?!)

So... what now? i am not my mind? OK. so i tried to do what the 'spiritual guide' suggested, and i tried to 'watch my thoughts'.... so i got...

computers..... my lap is hot.... it's a hot day.... the ice caps are melting... the world is ending.... aliens.... what do aliens look like... aliens look like naked, skinny, unhealthy supermodels with no hair and almond shaped eyes that see into your soul... i need new sneakers.... i haven't exercised at all today... wait yes i did i went shopping, that totally counts, i walked for ages.... ok thoughts... thoughts.... what are my thoughts doing now... nothing.... shoes.... food... am i hungry?? i had a bing boy for lunch. that was great.... i could eat them as my last meal... i remember the movie the green mile... that was sad... i'm not sad, i'm happy, because i got engaged two days ago!!!!!!! *opens eyes and looks at ring.....sighs happily*

OK. so... was  i watching my thoughts? i felt like i was THINKING my thoughts. but i am not my mind... i am a watcher, according to that article... so.... i was witnessing my thoughts, not ACTUALLY thinking them. They think themselves, according to the things that have happened around me. So... i'm not my mind... what the blip am i then?!

You are All That Is. You are All that is Not. All that is Not is necessary to experience All That Is, even though it does not exist.
You are the essence of life, the same essence which is in everyone.
You are the bum on the street, the millionaire in the jet, the Jew, the Christian, the Muslim, the athiest, the camel, the yo-yo, the sun, the moon, the infinite emptiness of space, and all form that exists in space.
You are everything.
We are all one.




Well... only SOME of that registers in my "mind". I think i had better give my "mind" a name, now that i realised i am not my mind. Like, maybe that will help me feel more removed from it. Is it a girl mind or a boy mind? Maybe it's both. What's a good girlboy name.... how about... Echo.... because.... well, because Dollhouse, that's why.

OK, so me and echo are here, chillin... and we are gonna sort this situation out, because now... thinking about "me" (not the body me, not the mind/Echo me, but the REAL me... the watcher.... the witness... behind all that mind&body crap).... thinking about "me" as being everything... well that makes me think about The Egg by Andy Weir... and i feel like life is a puzzle that "me" hasn't figured out yet.... and, if so many "people" (i use this term loosely, as a person is basically a body and a mind with another "me" inside it) think about this stuff, and already have it figured out... what chance do I have?! what chance do WE have!?

So.... what are "your thoughts" on this?

symmetricity

i have these quotes in my head:

without the darkness, we would never see the stars



there could be no rainbow for the soul
had the eyes no tears

I'm not actually sure who they're from/by... i could have read them on the back of a train ticket or heard it in a song... but either way, they're nice quotes to have stuck in my head. They really remind me what i believe in life, and it brings me back to the story about 'just enough'. I call it just enough, though i think the title is actually 'I wish you enough'. I remember that i came across the story and i started reading it because he was talking about airports... personally, i love airports. When i think about going on a trip, i get more excited about going to the airport than anything else! Call me crazy. Anywhoooo, read the story. michael and i both read it and thought it was awesome. In fact, michael gave me a necklace for our first anniversary that had 'just enough' engraved in the back. It's a fantastic mantra to live by; you need just enough bad times, to appreciate the good... and just enough good times to make the bad worth going through. Balance. I'm a fairly big lover of symmetry myself. I think even the world revolves around this mantra though - we have a lot of amazing, beautiful, lovely places in the world... but we also have the opposite. In our world there are a lot of people who are terrible souls, menacing humans with no positive energy... and then we also have a lot of sensational spirits, who glow with positivity, love, and grace. It's a balance. yin and yang.

I think some people get so bogged down in their darkness, they forget to look at the stars. 

i'm going to  start cooking dinner now.
peace, love, and light. <3

I haven't posted on here for a long time... i think that's because i sometimes think it's better to write things down in my personal, real life, made of dead tree journal... however, right now i'm comfy on the couch with my headphones on, a re-run of Dollhouse in another tab, and absolutely no desire to get up... SO... i decided i'm going to do what i do BEST... make a list.

This list is inspired by something i was thinking about earlier today; the simple pleasures in life. About three weeks ago i FORCED (literally, held him down) michael to watch Amelie. This is not something one should have to do - Amelie is amazing enough that i should not have to force someone to watch it... but anyway...  it got me to thinking about the different things that people enjoy doing... and how sometimes the most simple things can cause such pleasure! I suppose if i was going to give you a universal example, it would be ... bubble wrap. WHO doesn't like popping bubble wrap? you hold it, and the urge to pop just TAKES OVER! It's pleasurable. there's no real reason... i wouldn't say it's an indication that we are hiding some deep seeded need for destruction... it's just... it's a textile thing... it feels good. ANYWAY... here's my list of things that are seemingly meaningless, but for some strange reason they give me little tingles of happiness and joy... tiny little joygasms. ^.^

Little Things In Life:

• covering my palm with aquadhere glue, letting it dry, then peeling it off
• dipping cold fingers into hot dish water
• watching the petrol indicator line go up after i've filled it to full
• ripping a perforated piece of paper out of a notebook and having NO little ripped bits
• drying in between my toes after a bath or shower
• finding a $5 note that past me left for future me in the 'coin drawer'*** of my car
• getting handwritten smail mail from a friend

CHILDHOOD MEMORY
This list has just triggered a memory which i would like to share with you;
my grandparents (forever known as Grandma & Grandpa Sprinkle, because i couldn't pronounce their surname) used to own a shack/house at Sellicks Beach. It was a two story house with 3 bedrooms, and whenever we went to stay, my sister, my mum, and I, would sleep on the top floor in 2 rooms, with my grandparents sleeping downstairs. There are LOTS of memories from this shack, all of which are specifically designated to my glorious childhood because they sold the shack when i was approximately a teenanger.(WOW... that was a Freudian typo/slip. TEENAGER. not teenanger... mwa ha ha) Hm. i'm excellent at getting off topic tonight...
One most wonderful feeling, which i can only ever relive in hotels, is getting into grandma's freshly cleaned and folded sheets in bed... and she used to tuck the sheets in SO damn tight, i used to spend the first eight minutes of bedtime kicking my feet around in the bottom of the bed until it was loosened enough to comfortably sleep in (or until i had thoroughly exhausted myself from kicking). At the time, i hated having to do this... but now i remember it with a nostalgic smile on my face.
Another thing i remember, now thinking about it, was getting my head stuck between the balustrades on the stairs... maybe not such a fond memory there.

***(just as a side note, i firmly believed that all cars came with a coin drawer, for when you have to pay for parking, and was completely shocked to be told, at the ripe age of 26, that the coin drawer is actually an ashtray... and that a lot of cars are now not being made with ashtrays. >.<     )

ok, that's my rant over. does anybody actually read this blog? no. But maybe one day, if we haven't ruined/exploded the earth, when my children are all grown up, and the internet can be accessed through eyeballs or neurons or something... they will find this blog, and they will be able to have some kind of insight into their mother's 20-something-year-old brain.

RIGHTO! bye.